Phases of the Moon
by Jaino
Summary: Sirius and James were a couple until the Whomping Willow incident. James gets extremely mad at Sirius and tells Sirius their relationship is over. Mpreg Better then it sounds
1. Chapter 1

Title: Phases of the Moon

Author: Jaino

Fandom: Harry Potter

Pairing: James/Sirius

Rating: R

Disclaimer: I own nothing, everything belongs to JK Rowling. I just use it every now and then.

Summary: Sirius and James were a couple until the Whomping Willow incident. James gets extremely mad at Sirius and tells Sirius their relationship is over.

Note: I found one of my old stories written way back when for the SxJ fiction FEST!. I have rewritten some of the story to give it a better flow. I hope you like it. And a Special Thank you, for my very helpful Beta reader Sophocles!  
With out you things would have... well lets not go there ;) Thanks Hun!  
-Jaino

Hogwarts:

"I don't understand you Sirius, how could you betray us?" James glared at his boyfriend, anger coursing through his body. He couldn't believe Sirius let the Marauder's deepest darkest secret slip to that greasy git Snape. A secret that they all vowed Never Ever to tell anyone about... _**anyone**_ and putting him, them all in danger.

"Please James, it was a mistake. I just wanted to- to..." Sirius stumbled over the words; he never thought that his joke would have turned out like this, betraying his friends trust, endangering everyone's safety" letting it go far enough that someone got hurt" even if that person was Snape.

Normally Sirius was a well-rounded person, but the events that had taken place in the span of three days, really shook him up. Everything was so jumbled, things had happened too fast.

First Snape had threatened to expose them on their monthly disappearances, so Sirius had made up the joke to scare Snape into keeping his mouth shut. But then everything had gone so wrong; Snape almost had gotten badly injured. If it wasn't for James saving him at the last minute. The visit to Madam Pomfrey, the talk with Professor Dumbledore soon after┘ Sirius only wanted to protect his friends, his lover now after everything" he just wanted everything to be okay again.

Quickly cutting him off. "To what, Sirius? Have a little fun, ruin Remus's life?" he said glaring at Sirius, unwilling to take pity on him. James watched Sirius holding himself tightly.

Snapping his head up swiftly--shaking it in denial. "No, James, that's not why, I would never want that to happen, I care about-"

James's eyes flew open then; he hadn't even realized he'd closed them. "You _care_? I bet you cared so much you probably thought that it would make Remus happy in Azakban, huh?" James yelled out at Sirius. His right hand shot out and grasped Sirius's arm tightly.

His words stabbed Sirius deeply, combined with the hard grip on his arm, Sirius softly whimpered. Sirius's eyes stung with tears, but he refused to let them fall; he wouldn't let James words affect him yet.

Not before he finished explaining his side of the story to James. "No, I just-" Sirius started to speak but James cut him off once again.

James's anger had taken over his body and possessed his soul.

"I don't want to hear it, Sirius, and I... I don't I want you anymore" his voice stumbled only slightly; staring at Sirius, he just couldn't see who he was anymore.

Rage had put emphasis on all the bad qualities Sirius had, overshadowing everything else. Thinking what had always lurked in the back of James's mind: that the Sirius he and the others cared for, the fun loving, strong willed, loyal person was all just an act.

Sirius had finally showed his true colors' an arrogant, selfish, disloyal wizard from the house of Black.

James loosened his grip, letting Sirius go; looking at him, all James could see was a person who had betrayed everything that the Marauders stood for: friendship, laughter, family, and most importantly Loyalty.  
Not the Sirius he thought he knew, but a stranger, a stranger he couldn't stand.

James looked at Sirius's stunned expression; feeling little, he began to make his way to the door. Sirius just stood frozen as the James's words started to make sense.

"What? No, James, y-you don't mean that, we haven't discussed anything yet." Sirius couldn't believe his ears. 'What was James saying? That he didn't want to be with him anymore?' Sirius couldn't accept that. Holding his arm out, he blocked James path, Sirius stopped him from taking any more steps. Taking a fistful of James's robes, Sirius could feel his own heart beating rapidly with fear and anticipation.

"Yes, I do, Sirius, you're not the person I thought you were." James looked at Sirius's clenched fist. "I don't want you to talk to any of us; you are on your own now, you dug your own grave." He pushed Sirius off roughly, stumbling as Sirius grasped him around the chest, holding tightly.

"NO! You can't mean that! I didn't get to explain anything James-"Sirius said, trying to get James to listen to him.

"Enough Sirius," James said, his voice hard. He began to struggle out of Sirius tight embrace.

"You said-- you said that you would be with me forever!" His voice was high pitched and full of panic, he couldn't let go, he knew that if he did, he would lose James forever.

James finally twisted one of Sirius wrists, prying his arms off. "No! No, we're not done talking yet! I haven't explained to you," Sirius cried out as James shook him off and walked towards the door. "Please James, wait... _**Wait**_!" he called out, struggling to get up, trying to stop James from leaving.

But as he stood up, James gave him one last glare. Then opening the door, he started to walk out.

Sirius hit the door as it closed. Kneeling, he bent his head resting it against the door. "No.. no.. no.. nononono- I didn't explain James, I didn't explain, I only wanted to-to protect us, only protect..." The words softly chanted, muffled sobbing against the door, his body lay crumpled.


	2. Chapter 2

Title: Phases of the Moon (1/?)

Chapter 2

--

Sirius stared out one of the bedroom windows tucked away in the corner in an alcove behind some tapestries; this had become his secret hideaway.

Weeks had passed by since the whole Whomping Willow incident, and James…

He sat alone; no one would talk to him since the Marauders refused to have anything to do with him--the school was in an uproar about the whole thing for weeks. Despite Sirius's popularity, with the combined forces of the remaining Marauders, the school chose to follow their lead and exclude him all together. Now the most he could hope for was a cutting remark here and there; other than that it was like he was a shadow on the wall, no better then a Muggle painting, except at least those paintings got some interaction.

He had stopped trying to get them to acknowledge him, choosing to spend his time alone sitting in his Sanctuary just thinking. Sometimes he forgot to eat when it was dinnertime, but it didn't matter; he wasn't that hungry anymore.

Sirius knew he deserved it all; he only wanted to protect their secrets and keep them safe. He knew he should have told the others what Snape had said, but he acted irrationally again, not thinking about the consequences... choosing instead to handle it childishly and stupidly; in doing that he had lost what he cherished most: the Marauders… James.

It was a hard lesson to learn, and Sirius had learned it a little too well.

It got to the point where James wouldn't even give him the time of day, snubbing him the many times he tried to explain, to beg forgiveness; the others were no better. Sirius tried very hard to apologize to Remus as well, more so than James, but the werewolf could be even more stubborn than Sirius himself. Peter just backed them both up, leaving Sirius frustrated and more than a bit sad.

Sirius sighed. Now Remus, Peter and… James spent all their time with Lily… apparently it didn't take that long to replace him. Everyone knew that the redhead was infatuated with James; it wasn't even two days after James had broken up with Sirius that she came in and stood in his place.

Tears welled up, blurring his vision; no, it didn't take long, not long at all.


	3. Chapter 3

Title: Phases of the Moon (1/?)

Chapter 3

--

Sirius shot up in bed, throwing his legs over the side as he ran blindly into the bathroom. After several minutes, Sirius took a deep breath, willing his stomach to settle. Finally, he pushed himself up off the floor, fumbling his way to the sink.

After a good rinsing, Sirius looked up at the mirror, his face still flushed from his earlier episode. Sighing, he dropped to the floor again, leaning his head to rest on the side of the sink; this was the twentieth time he had thrown up in these past months.

For the most part he was able to hide it, from using silencing spells that were charmed to keep from waking anyone up, to skipping out in anything that had to do with others not that they asked him to join anymore.

Sirius could feel flutters dancing about in his slightly protruding stomach, resting a gentle hand on the little lump. Closing his eyes, he could now see what he had been trying to not to think about, to deny that he was irregularly getting ill or that he spent most of his time so tired that he slept in class occasionally.

The professors were starting to get very irritated, deducting points left and right, causing more tension between him and the Gryffindors.

His eyes squeezed shut, trying not to think about what it could mean, but he just couldn't deny it anymore. The evidence was starting to show… He was pregnant with James's baby…he had to be. Lifting his left hand, he rubbed his eyes, while the other continued to caress his stomach.

There was no other explanation, as Sirius never had slept with anyone else; sure he was popular, but with Quidditch and the Marauders he never had time to really think about sleeping with someone. Besides, he'd been in love with James since they met on the train; he had never wanted anyone else.

Taking a deep breath, Sirius sat up straighter. Squaring his shoulders, he pushed up off the floor. Taking a few minutes to refresh himself, Sirius stared at his reflection; he only saw a pale, sickly, hollowed-out boy looking back at him.

Sirius closed his eyes quickly to block out his image, easing the stinging in his eyes. 'No wonder James didn't want him anymore… he' Sirius put a hand on his stomach. 'No, he wouldn't think that way, now wasn't the time for that, right now he just needed something to help him confirm his suspicions…'

Sirius walked to the door. Carefully turning the doorknob, he peeked out. Seeing his other roommates still asleep, he crept out, quickly making his way to his trunk.

In a few minutes he was fully dressed in a dark blue Muggle t-shirt, black sweat pants, and a think winter robe.

Glad that it was Saturday, as everyone tended to sleep in, he made his way to the library. As quietly as possible, he pulled open one of the double doors; slipping inside, he went to the "Charms and Incantations" section of the library.

Sirius tried not to think about all the time he and James spent, trying to see who could be the quietest in their escapades. Hiding in dark murky corners in the ancient library, he shook himself slightly, banishing the thoughts away as he came to the section he was looking for.

Reaching up on the third shelf next to the "Charms That Will Change Your Looks" and "Using Correct Enunciation in Incantations". Sirius found what he was looking for; it was lying there innocently. With shaking hands, Sirius picked up the worn book, glancing briefly at the cover: "Charms for the Expecting Wizard or Witch" Sirius could feel panic threatening to boil over.

Tucking the book under his arm, Sirius rushed from the room, his steps echoing in the hall. 'Don't stop, don't stop' kept running through his head. Finally reaching the Common room door, he whispered the password, slipping inside. Sirius looked around, then running towards the sixth year boys' dormitories.

Out of breath, Sirius took the steps two at a time. Holding the book tightly as he caught his breath, Sirius walked slowly up to the door. Raising his right hand, he turned the knob gently; pushing it open; he slipped inside, shutting the door quietly.

With softly padding footsteps, he crept around the beds. Coming to the tapestry, he pushed inside. Quickly, he muttered two spells, one to conceal the room and another to silence any sounds that might come out of it.

Sirius gently laid the book on the desk to the left of the window; his hands shook lightly as he opened it. Skimming the contents, he found what he was looking for, reading carefully as he pulled his wand from his pocket.

It was a fairly easy spell; just a few flicks coupled with one swish of the wand, while saying "Vide quod est ingnotus". A light blue glow would reveal that the person was carrying; a green glow would reveal the person wasn't pregnant.

Sirius could do this; taking another deep breath, he steadied his hands. One by one, he completed each step; at the end of "ingnotus", Sirius held his breath as the wand hovered over his slight belly.

A soft blue glow lighted, merrily flickering at Sirius as if to say hello…

With a sharp 'clack' his wand hit the floor; hunching over, Sirius folded his arms protectively over his belly. Slowly, he began to laugh. Tears stung his eyes till they fell rhythmically onto the stone floor.

After long minutes, his breath hitching, Sirius swiped his eyes; bending down he reached under the desk where his wand had fallen.

Sirius took a quick look outside the room's only window; it was midday now. Taking a deep breath to compose himself, Sirius lifted his chin up, squaring his shoulders once more.

James had to listen to Sirius's side of the story now; Sirius refused to take no for an answer this time. He cared about James and rest of the Marauders; Sirius would prove that he was sincere and earn their forgiveness.

But first he had to tell James he was carrying their baby… Sirius smiled at that thought. 'Their baby, his and James' something that would always be a part of them both, and no matter what James decided, Sirius was never going to regret this baby… his most precious love.

With one last breath, he was ready.

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Note: "Vide quod est ingnotus" means, "To see which is unknown"


	4. Chapter 4

Title: Phases of the Moon (1/?)

Chapter 4

--

Sirius glided down the long corridors with students and even professors watched in awe as Sirius strolled through the walkways. He held himself with a confidence that hadn't been seen in months; though slimmer than before, he still was a sight to see.

Everyone watched avidly as Sirius came to a halt in front of the conversing Marauders, they were sitting out on the stone walls out in the open hallway.

Sirius was aware of everyone's eyes on him as he stopped in front of James and the others. The conversation they were having, trickled off as they noticed him standing there.

Peter was the first to speak. "Sirius- what do you want?" he sneered; apparently thinking he could bully Sirius. The others watched quietly, curious to see what else would Peter do.

They were surprised to say the least. Peter was the runt of the group, only as tall as Sirius's chest, and that was saying a lot considering, Sirius was the next shortest of the four. Normally a very nervous person with a stuttering problem, Peter didn't get much attention, except from the other three, but it seemed that Peter was nowhere around today.

"There's no dogs allowed, Padfoot." With that, Peter stood up, reaching out to shove Sirius.

The surrounding students and a few professors, perked up as soon as they saw Peter approach Sirius; it escalated from there.

Before Peter's hands connected with Sirius's stomach, Sirius sidestepped him, causing Peter to trip. After he fell, Peter stared up at Sirius, blinking confusedly.

Sirius grabbed Peter, his protective instincts jumped into high gear; Peter had unknowingly threatened the baby inside him. "Don't ever touch me, Wormtail," he growled a warning to the frightened boy. Sirius shook him roughly, emphasizing the point.

The professors had already moved to stop the argument when the students began to rush forward, trying to get closer to the action; everyone was pushing and shoving trying to get to the 'infamous four'.

Remus and James watched, a bit shocked at how aggressive Sirius was; they paid no attention to the chaos that had begun around them, only watching the frail looking Sirius continue to shake a distraught Peter.

Snapping out of it, James stood up from his perch; rushing over, he gripped Sirius's hands while Remus watched quietly, his gaze on Sirius wistful and more then a touch sad.

Sirius didn't seem to notice James, only focusing on the plump little creature in his hands.

"Let him go, Sirius!" James yelled. He managed to loosen Sirius's grip slightly.

But Sirius wouldn't let go; all he could think in his mind was that someone had tried to hurt his baby, this person tried, and something inside him was telling him to defend himself, protect the tiny life inside.

Watching Sirius, James could see that he wasn't even with them anymore, lost in his thoughts.

"You're hurting him, Sirius." James trying again to coax Sirius let go; finally he felt Sirius's hands freeze.

Sirius looked in shock at Peter, who was sniffling with tears. His fingers loosened slowly, dropping away from Peter's robes.

Running a hand in his hair, Sirius stammered, "I'm-I'm sorry Peter, I-I don't know what got into me." He brought one hand up to cover his mouth, while the other wrapped around his middle.

Finally, the noises from the crowd drew all four Marauders' attention. The Marauders stared as the crowd of students turned on one another; things had broken out into a huge fight on the castle grounds. The professors were trying to contain them all, but failing as their wands were jostled in the crowd.

"Stop this at once!" A booming voice froze the entire open corridor; not once in the entire school's history since Professor Dumbledore teaching career started had anyone ever heard him speak out so loud.

He marched out of the open double doors towards the mass of students and teachers. His head was held high and his usually twinkling eyes sparked with blue fire.

"Now that I have everyone's attention, which is to blame for all of this?" The words were softly spoken; everyone cringed, knowing that they were all in for it.

The Marauders stood still, Remus, James, and Peter looking at Sirius next to them as he watched Professor Dumbledore question several people.

Feeling eyes on him, Sirius turned to look at his old friends, making a step toward them, an apology on his lips. "Guys, I-" Sirius was cut off by the hand on his shoulder.

Professor Dumbledore was looking down at him. "Come along my boy," he said. Startled, Sirius looked around, to find that they were the only ones left in the corridor.

"Wait for me in my office, that's a good boy," Professor Dumbledore said as a confused Sirius walked through the open doors.

Turning to James and Remus, Professor Dumbledore beckoned, "James and Remus, you too, we have lot's to discuss." Before James had a chance to protest, Professor Dumbledore hands were on his and Remus's shoulders ushering them inside the castle.

"Peter, you too, go off and visit Madam Pomfrey; the others will be along later." With that, Professor Dumbledore, closed the doors behind them, leading both Remus and James up to his office, where Sirius was.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -


	5. Chapter 5

Title: Phases of the Moon (1/?)

Chapter 5

--

After a lengthy lecture and not a few questions on the whole incident

(mainly for Remus, who told the bystander point of view), Sirius walked tiredly back to the common rooms, James and Remus had left the lecture a few minutes early; Professor Dumbledore had wanted to speak with him alone.

A few questions here and there, on how he was feeling to everything in between, after several reassurances that he was just fined, Sirius was excused.

But as he was leaving, Professor Dumbledore told Sirius, he could always come talk to him if anything was wrong, and that he could always come to him for help and guidance.

As Sirius was halfway to the common rooms, his belly growled loudly. Stopping Sirius tried to think when was the last time he ate, turning pale he realized he hadn't eaten since yesterday.

Making his way quickly to the Great Hall, noticing that it would be

dinnertime soon, letting out a breath of relief; Sirius touched a hand to the small bump in his stomach.

Silently promising the baby that he wouldn't miss any more meals, Sirius passed the open doorway, making his way through all the tables till he reached the Gryffindor table.

At the table, the only space left was a space next to Peter, who sat right across, James and Remus. Gathering up his nerves Sirius made his way to the empty spot, seating himself, he began to fill his plate up.

Sirius started to think how he could get James to meet him in their old 'hideaway' spot, Sirius really needed to tell James about the baby, after a few minutes of being lost in this thoughts Sirius noticed something.

There was complete silence at the table; everyone stopped eating to watch the former inseparable Marauders sit together. Sirius was getting a little nervous; he began to pick at his food, ignoring the others as they continued to watch.

The silence was broken when Remus leaned over to Sirius, asking, "Can you please pass me the salt Sirius?"

Snapping his head up Sirius, blinked at Remus, Remus's hand held out, waiting for the saltshaker. Sirius picked it up, slowly putting it in Remus's hands.

"Thank you" Remus said as soon as the saltshaker was in his hand, putting salt on his meal, he started to eat. Unmindful of the constant watching eyes, Remus kept his eyes downward, glancing up occasionally at Sirius.

Startled Sirius started to eat, James and Peter giving one last look to Remus, they also started on their meals. The Great hall picked up, becoming absorbed in there own affairs once more.

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A/N: I want to say thank you to all the great folks for posted a review! You've made my day :) -Jaino


	6. Chapter 6

Title: Phases of the Moon (1/?)

Chapter 6

--

A/N: Hi Everyone! I hope this makes up for how short Ch. 5 is. Enjoy - Jaino

--

Nervously Sirius paced outside the abandon classroom, he was waiting for James to show, after dinner had ended Sirius quickly left the Great Hall.

Waiting outside he quickly wrote up a short note, asking James to meet him in their old spot. Making it very urgent, Sirius slipped it James pocket as he passed by.

That had been thirty minutes ago, Sirius worried that James wouldn't even come. Sirius paced back and forth thought the dusty room, biting his nails as he waited.

The door made a loud creaking sound as James slipped through the door, frightening Sirius, who covered his belly in protection.

James let out a frustrated sigh "Okay what was so important that you had me meet you here?" crossing his arms over his chest, glaring at Sirius.

Shaking himself slightly Sirius; brought his hands to clasp over his stomach.

"James… I" he paused "I know that… we've haven't been on the best of terms… these past few months, but I-" before Sirius could finish James interrupted.

"Sirius if this is about us getting back together, it's too late for that, besides-," James paused looking at Sirius, who had tightened his hands over stomach.

"I'm with Lily now, I'm meeting her right after we're done here" With that said James waited for Sirius to continue, looking at Sirius's body shaking, James wondered what he ever saw in him.

James starting to grow impatient "Well Sirius I'm waiting" he said huffily, tapping his left foot.

James silently had a thought creep up on him… 'Why didn't he feel sorry for Sirius, this way the man he "supposedly" loved with his whole being… shouldn't he at _**least**_ feel something? Anything?

But before James could dwell on it further, something pushed it to the back of his mind; once more all he could feel towards Sirius was contempt.

"Forget it, I'm out of here" James lost patience with Sirius; he turned around to leave, muttering angrily under his breath.

Sirius heard what James said, moving to stop him, he took hold of James robe "No wait James, I'm-I'm sorry, I'll tell you" Sirius didn't want James to leave before he told him, he didn't want things to end like the last time.

James turned around, now facing Sirius, "No it's too late Sirius, I already gave you a chance to tell me what ever the bloody hell you wanted to, but you didn't say anything, Lily's waiting for me." Sirius paled at the Mention of James 'Girlfriend' his stomach twisted as his heart throbbed painfully.

"I'm leaving!" James tugged his robe free from Sirius's grasp.

"Stop… wait! James please I-I love you" Sirius was desperate he scrambled towards James pulling him back, his hands grasping what ever he could find, James robe, arms, shoulders as James fought off Sirius's grasping hands.

" Let go Sirius!" James sounded very angry, but Sirius didn't care, finally James shoved Sirius back causing him to fall hard on the floor. James could feel a pang of sorrow hit him when he saw what he done, but it was pushed aside again.

Sirius laid on his right side, his hip was stinging badly were he landed on it. Breathing hard, he looked up at James through his bangs.

At the same time James stared down at Sirius, something was urging him to bend down and help, Sirius, hold him close and never let go… but something stronger squished that feeling down, making him turn to walk out, burying his feelings…

"I'm pregnant…." Sirius softly whispered, voice thin and shaking. Bowing his head and hands holding his stomach, Sirius waited for James to speak.

"Your… Pregnant?" James voice full of disbelief. Turning to look at Sirius as the other boy nodded. "You've…got to be kidding me" James couldn't believe that Sirius was telling him he was **pregnant**

Sirius huddled into himself, quietly listening to James speak "I can't believe you would sink so low just to get me back, I bet there isn't even a baby, your just making it all up" Sirius jerked up at that.

"How dare you" Sirius's eyes blazed with fury "I-I'm carrying _**your**_ child James, your _**baby**_", Sirius pulled himself up asquickly as his aching muscles would allow.

He'd be damned if James wouldn't acknowledge this baby as his, let alone **real**, "Don't you even try tell me that I'm making this all up!" Sirius started to shout at James.

James was angry, but he couldn't remember why "I bet even if you were having a kid, it's probably not even mine, _**You**_ whore!" James threw the remark at Sirius, so fast it took a while for Sirius to processes it.

"What…you-you piece of Jarvey shit!" Sirius screamed "I never even **slept** with anyone else but you! You hypocrite, if anyone's the whore it's **you**" Sirius didn't care what came out of his mouth he just wanted to hurt James like he hurt him.

"You slept with half the damn 5th, 6th **and** 7th year class before we even started to go out James and you were still in 6th year!" angry Sirius picked up a book laying close by on a desk, throwing it straight at James, hitting the side of his head.

"I hate you James Potter! I never want you near me or my child!" with that Sirius ran from the room tears falling from his eyes, as he left a bleeding James sitting on the floor clutching his forehead.

--


	7. Chapter 7

Title: Phases of the Moon (1)  
Chapter 7

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A/N: Sorry for the wait. I got a little sick, but here is the next chapter & a big THANK YOU!! to xxxxParvati-Patilxxxx, Pixy Black, Lively48,  
XxMemories4everxX and last but not least Hermione Jean Potter for all the lovely reviews. I really loved them :) -Jaino

--

Sirius had enough, he went through so much, endured so much that this was his finally breaking point. 'Did he really deserve all this?' he thought making his way down a stone corridor to the Gryffindor common rooms.

Wiping his tears away Sirius began to think about all the things that had happened, that might happened and what could have happened.

Sirius had only did what he thought would protect them, yes he made the wrong choice 'but hadn't it been enough, all the pain, the loneliness... wasn't it enough?' Sirius stopped walking, looking down the hall he could see the entrance to the Gryffindor common rooms.

'Was it even worth staying for anymore? Did he really want to, that was the real question.' With those thoughts in mind, Sirius slowly back way, turning he made his way to Professor Dumbledore's chambers.

Hours later Sirius sat in his sanctuary, preparations had been made, he would be leaving Hogwarts, early next morning, to start at 'Selifreick' a secondary school for Wizards, and Witches in the town of Montrose, home of the Montrose Magpies.

It was planned that he would join the school when they came back from their holidays, which started a few days from now. Leaving Sirius at the school to accustom his self to the new settings.

Sirius was told that the school was very open-minded and it would be no problem to attend there when he would really start showing. Sirius been told the house elf's would be taken care of all his things and not to worry, Professor Dumbledore would be by every so often to check up on him.

After leaving, Sirius began to wonder if he made the right choice... but he thought of all the things, he and James had said, and the whole thing with the Marauders, silenced his doubts... The others didn't need nor wanted him anymore, it was for the best.

Hearing foots steps coming close to the entrance behind him, Sirius swiped at his eyes, brushing all traces of tears away.

At that second the tapestry was pulled aside, Remus looked in peering at the slightly darken room lit only by the stars.

"Padfoot?" Remus's voice called in concern, his body held in tension, relaxing when he saw Sirius sitting in the shadows next to the window.

Sirius sat frozen as Remus stepped into his sanctuary; walking closer Remus knelt in front of Sirius hand out as if to touch him, but at the last second stopped.

"Paddy are you okay?" Sirius looked at Remus's eyes, face blank,  
he felt no emotions.

Tilting his head slightly to the left Sirius looked at Remus through his limp hair "Paddy?" he softly let out "Since when do you still call me '_Paddy'_ Remus" voice low.

Remus startled at that "Sirius- I just wanted to see how you are" he couldn't believe how awful Sirius looked since he seen him last,  
Sirius had always worn his emotions on his sleeve; defeat had taken a toll on Sirius. It showed in his eyes, they way he carried himself,  
drawing attention to his frail looking body.

Remus started noticing how ill Sirius looked a few weeks ago but didn't do or say anything, still too flushed with anger and hurt to consider how Sirius was faring.

But now... it was too much for the usually kind hearted werewolf to ignore. He couldn't brush it off anymore; Sirius was wasting away.  
Finally reaching out he laid a hand on Sirius's slight shoulder, wincing as Sirius flinched at the touch.

Sirius stiffened his body "I'm fine, you don't need to pretend you care" pushing him off he got up making his way out.

Grabbing Sirius's arm stopping him from leaving Remus said, "Wait a minute Sirius, I do care about you okay? I know that me and the others have been snubbing you but that's because we felt betrayed and were angry." Remus turn Sirius around wincing at how frail he felt "But I'm not mad anymore I don't want you to- I just want you back Sirius' we all do." Pulling him into an embrace

Remus was worried that Sirius wasn't listening that he to caught up in despair. But slowly he could feel Sirius's arm shifting up to complete the embrace.

He let out his breath not even realizing he held it, soothingly Remus rubbed his hands up and down Sirius's back as the boy stated to shake.  
He could hear his breath becoming labored as he felt Sirius start to cry silently.

"Shhh... it's okay, Paddy," Remus softly whispered, voice lowered, like how one would calm an upset animal or, in this case, a puppy.  
Gently, he lowered them both to sit on the stone floor; running his fingers through Sirius's hair, he continued to comfort his companion.

"I'm s-so- so sorry, Remus..." Sirius started to choke out. "I didn't mean it to happen this way... I really didn't," Sirius cried, his voice full of tears. Sirius couldn't tell Remus what happened with James, that he was leaving... he didn't want to spoil the mood.

He just wanted to savor this one last embrace; that's all he wanted,  
he wouldn't ask for more, just this...

The two friends held each other tightly, murmuring apologies back and forth as they began to patch together their torn friendship.

Soon Remus's eyes started to fall, Sirius led him back into the dorm room, helping him to bed. Sleepily, Remus snuggled in his bed sheets.  
"Goodnight, Sirius, I'm glad we're friends again." With that,  
Remus fell asleep.

"Goodnight Remus..." Sirius blinked back the tears, lips trembling he smiled; giving Remus's hand one last squeeze, he blew out the candle next to the bed.

"And... Goodbye..." he whispered faintly.

--


	8. Chapter 8

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Title: Phases of the Moon (1/?)

Chapter 8

--

Remus woke up feeling happier than he had in months; he really had missed Sirius, and things hadn't been the same without him. But now they would all be together again! The four Marauders reunited.

He couldn't wait to wake up James and Peter to tell them, he had forgiven Sirius; that was the only thing left to clear up, then everything would be back to normal.

Remus had started to worry about James and Sirius. He never wanted to break them up; James and Sirius was a match made in heaven, in his opinion. But over the months he noticed that Sirius was losing a lot of weight, barely talking to anyone, while James acted like there was nothing between them.

Like James and Sirius had never been more then disliked acquaintances. James began spending most of his time with Lily; Remus even heard that they were now dating.

Remus had been slightly alarmed at that; how does someone go from loving another with every fiber of their being to feeling absolutely nothing? Remus thought that it was anger making James act out, but hoped that now things were settled, James and Sirius would work things out.

Lily just gave Remus bad vibes, setting his instincts off left and right. As a werewolf, he learned to trust his instincts.

Pushing back the disturbing thoughts, he went over to Sirius's bed, after looking to see if James still out; he was probably still with Lily. Remus felt a pang of sadness for Sirius; he knew how much he loved James, and it must have been killing him to see James with Lily now.

Vowing to help Sirius get James back, he pulled open the curtains. "Wake up, Padfoot, its time to greet the sun." He was surprised to find it empty, save for a small envelope.

Having a bad feeling about this, Remus picked up the envelope, his hands shaking slightly; opening it, he began to read. His face became pale as he read through it; James had just walked in and saw Remus standing next to Sirius's bed.

"What you got there, Moony?" he said, looking over Remus's shoulder, trying to take a look.

Remus dropped the letter, watching it with unseeing eyes as it fluttered down. "He's gone…" Remus said softly.

James starting to get worried wrapped an arm over Remus's shoulder; Remus stood still in shock, staring at the fallen letter.

"Who's gone?" James urged gently.

"Sirius…" Remus's voice trailed off quietly.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Sirius stepped off the train. The whole trip took about a week to get from Hogwarts to Montrose. Tired and his back aching Sirius stood on the platform taking in the scenery.

The people were a lot more… sport influenced. Quidditch banners hung across the walls of buildings, favorite quidditch team colors appeared on people's robes passing by (with Magpies as the majority)

"Mr. Black I presume" a deep voice stated in back of Sirius. Turning around Sirius met a tall man, dressed in various colors of gray; a softly rounded face with light eyes and hair greeted him.

"Y-yes sir" Sirius gripped his carryon bag; he shifted it in front of his stomach. Warily staring at the stranger.

"I'm Professors Baidien, of the Selifreick secondary school for Wizards and Witches. Please follow me." With that the professor turned and started to walk towards the exit.

"But what about the rest of my bags?" Sirius trailed after the professor.

"Don't worry they arrived before you did" with that the professor climbed into a carriage, holding his hand out to help Sirius in.

On the way, Sirius began asking some questions about the school, trying not to think about James, and how Remus might have reacted to his letter.

The conversation lasted until the came upon the castle, it sat on a grasses hill, with a huge quidditch pitch, and Sirius could make out some players flying about. "Umm professor… I thought that students couldn't play on the fields during holidays and such" Sirius questioned.

"Well here in Montrose, as you may have notice Quidditch is very big here. We allow students that stay over for the holidays to participate in games to help pass the time. Also in summer we hold a Special quidditch tournament, where the students may come back in July to play in house teams."

Sirius was amazed… 'Maybe he could…' he stopped himself. 'No that might injure the baby… but at least he could watch.

Later walking into the Great Hall, Sirius was asked to take a seat a chair, on a platform. A hat was place on his head; "Kneazle!" rang out in the near empty hall.

He was quickly settled into the Kneazle dorm room, the equivalent to Gryffindor. Sighing he laid down in his bed, finally Sirius cried himself to sleep. He was lonely, he missed everyone, Remus and even James… he just wanted to go back to Hogwarts…


	9. Chapter 9

--

Title: Phases of the Moon (1/?)  
Chapter 9

--

Months later:

--

"I can't believe it, I just can't…." Remus shook his head in disbelief. "What do you mean your getting married, James don't you think that its to soon?"

"No, it's not too soon its perfect" James took a deep breath

"look schools over and I've already talk to Professor Dumbledore. He said that it was okay to have the wedding in the Great Hall, everything's all ready, the only thing I need now is have you say yes to being my best man."

Remus looked at James, he really thought that James and Sirius were going to get back together. It all felt so wrong somehow, James didn't even mourn the fact that Sirius was gone. Just blinked once the said 'Oh… ok…" what kind of person has that little of a reaction.

Remus knew something was wrong with James, the whole situation with Lily, was just plain wrong. He also noticed Peter acting a bit strange to… Peter always felt shifted to Remus; he just left a bad taste in his mouth. Remus vowed to watch and tries to figure out what the bloody hell was happening to them all.

"I guess…." Remus trailed off. He felt like he betrayed Sirius, Remus always had a small crush on Sirius, but when Sirius confessed to him about liking James, he backed off. Remus just wanted Sirius to be happy, and he had seen they belonged together…

'Now Sirius was gone, and James was marrying someone else…' he sighed 'James was ruining the best thing he would ever have…" Remus straightened "I'll see you later James… I've got some things to take care of."

"Alright see you then" James didn't seem to notice or care that Remus was reluctant to say yes.

Sirius shifted his weight around; his belly had growth fives sizes bigger. He decided to wait until the baby was born to find out the sex, Sirius was close his due date, just two weeks more until, he would finally hold his baby.

Sighing Sirius stretched his sore muscles; the baby shifted, and kicked out. Sirius winched, rubbing the spot gently, he tried to sooth the feisty little one.

Walking out from his dorm room, it was summer holidays and soon the Quidditch tournament would begin around his due date.

Sirius stopped he looked out one of the castle windows, I wonder how everyone is doing right now…

"Sirius! Come on Sirius we're going to be late for class!" two of Sirius's friends, called out.

One was Garth, he gave birth last month to a beautiful baby girl he named Calirei. And Savanya had yet to have her baby, which was due the following September.

Sirius sighed, "I'm coming" following the others to class.


	10. Chapter 10

--

Title: Phases of the Moon (1/?)  
Chapter 10

A/N: Hi everyone! Just a quick note: This chapter might be a little hard to read since the edit won't let me break the story lines better. So the **_Bold_** headers mean the scence changed. And thank you for all your reviews I hope this will clear up some of your questions! -Jaino

--

_**The Great Hall about two weeks later:**_

--

James watched Lily coming closer to him. She made a beautiful picture, red hair laced with white lilies; her expensive silk and white velvet gown shimmered in the candlelight.

But a distant feeling of confusing came over James… even as this beautiful creature approached him… it all felt wrong somehow…

--

_**Selifreick Quidditch pitch:**_

--

Sirius's labor had come hard and fast, he was sitting watching his house quidditch team 'Kneazles' play against the 'Runespoors' during a special summer holiday tournament. When the cramps he felt for the past few days sharpen and a feeling of wetness surrounded his lower body.

After letting out an agonized scream, Sirius was rushed to the schools infirmary.

--

_**The Great Hall:**_

--

Quickly shaking the feeling away, James smiled big as Lily came to stand next to him. They both took a moment to smile at each other, and then turned to face the minister.

Remus watched as James and Lily began to say their vows to one another, 'this is wrong he knew it' starting to fidget next to James as one of the grooms men.

Peter on the other side of Remus glanced over at Remus then at Lily who caught his eye, smirking at each other discreetly as James and Remus looked off.

Frowning again Peter looked back at Remus. '…'

--

_**The Selifreick infirmary:**_

--

"Ugh… pant… uhhh" pain rushed through his lower body, Sirius moaned in agony. Though the doctors had quickly cast the spells to ensure a safe birth for males, some hadn't taken any effect yet.

"Push Sirius, come on push…." the nurse gently urged Sirius to keep trying. Wiping the poor boys brow with a soft cloth, she knew how hard it was for males to give birth, most likely then not the 'mothers' never made it pass the birthing unless there were certain precautions taken.

Squeezing Sirius hand in comfort as the poor dear, arched painfully with another contraction.

--

_**The Great Hall:**_

--

"Do you Lily Evans take James Potter, to be your lawfully married husband, for Better or worse, in sickness and in health. To love and cherish in heaven and earth, to be faithful till death do you part?" The minister turned to Lily.

Lily smiled softly; her eyes gleamed with an unnamed emotion "I do"

--

_**The Selifreick infirmary:**_

--

"Arghh……Nnnh…. Huuhn" pain rush over and over his tired body. Sirius panted with effort, body drenched in sweat.

Something was wrong he could feel it, the baby… something was happening to the baby.

'Please… please Merlin, let my baby be ok' Sirius shook with barely suppressed tears, as the pain started to increase 'James…' he wanted James here with him. Sirius had never been so scared in his entire life.

"James…. Uhnn… I want James…. Please Merlin…"

--

_**The Great Hall:**_

--

"And do you James Potter take Lily Evans, to be your lawfully married wife,"

Remus couldn't put his finger on it, he thought about all the things that happened, starting from the beginning….

--

_**The Selifreick infirmary:**_

--

"….Putting to much trauma on Sirius's body, we might lose him…." One of the medi-wizards talked in hushed tones, "come on Sirius, just one more push…. Ok? And you'll see your beautiful baby, so just hang on a little bit more sweetling" the nurse continued to pet Sirius's damp brow.

"James…. Ugh… I want James…." Sirius started to cry hard.

"Sirius, luv just breath… that's it listen to the sound of my voice…" The nurse tried to speak as calmly as she could.

"Ahhhh…………. make it stop! Make it stop… Arghhhhhhhh….." with a yell, Sirius finally felt something slip from his body. Weakly he slumped back against the bed he was in.

"Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…" a cry broke the air.

"It's a boy! A beautiful baby boy" the nurse smiled and squeezed Sirius's sweaty hand. "Sirius? Luv are you…." She was stopped.

"…He's bleeding! Quick get the…" a medi-wizard shouted to the others.

--

_**The Great Hall:**_

--

Remus tuned out the ministers droning voice….

'It all started after the Whomping willow accident James and Sirius gotten into that big fight they started acting strange….' Remus stopped 'No… it didn't start then… it started two weeks before that….'

'James started hanging out with Lily then, getting some help with potions… and that's when he started pulling away slightly from Sirius…acting a bit different…' Remus remembered one incident where James came into the common room a bit late and Sirius asked concerned, if anything happened along the way. James had told Sirius to mind his own damn business, and Sirius being himself, snapped back. It was a very messy night, later James apologized and things went back to normal, at least it looked that way.

'Then Sirius started talking to Peter a little bit more since I was busy with Perfect duties that week…' Remus frowned with concentration.

'Peter…' Remus eyes widened with realization 'Peter was the one who told James about Lily offering to help him in the first place….' Remus felt sick 'that's…. that's when things started going down hill…"

"For Better or worse, in sickness and in health."

--

_**The Selifreick infirmary:**_

--

Sirius's body was exhausted; the trauma on his body had cost him all of his strength…

'Harry…' trying to keep his eyes open, but Sirius was so tired, things started to get fuzzy.

"…. Sirius…on….for…..baby…just….hold…" Sirius could hear the voices of the nurse but everything sounded so faint, he could barely make anything out. Sirius eyes filled with tears, he wanted to hold his baby, his baby boy…just once…

".H-Ha….Harry…" voice so tired, becoming faint. Sirius's fingers out reached to the baby, arm shaking with the effort.

--

_**The Great Hall:**_

--

"To love and cherish in heaven and earth, to be faithful until death do you part?"

'It sounded over the top but somehow everything added up. Peter was the last person to talk to Sirius before he had been confronted by Snape, James had seen Lily before meeting Sirius.' Remus couldn't believe he hadn't seen it before… 'Everything after that, it all added up… every single detail added up…'

--

_**The Selifreick infirmary:**_

--

The medi-wizards rushed quickly trying to casts, spells to stop the bleeding. But Sirius had lost too much; the baby had ripped Sirius's insides when he came out backwards.

The nurse, felt the burn of tears in the back of her eyes, praying with everything she had to keep Sirius holding on. Placing the baby Harry on Sirius's chest, she watched sadly as Sirius weakly stroke the baby's soft cheek.

"Lo-love you…" tears clouded his vision, but he refused to take his eyes off Harry, wanting his baby to be the last thing he ever saw….

'James….'

--

_**The Great Hall:**_

--

Remus stood stiffly as the minister finished his speech, starting intently at James.

"…" Eyebrows drawn, James looked unsure…conflicted. As if there was something going on in his head, that only he could hear.

"James?" Lily had reached over and touched him on the shoulder; her ring gleamed red, urging him with a look.

Watching Remus looked on as James's face suddenly smooth out, at the touch. He now understood one of the key pieces of the puzzle.

Everyone's eyes on James, waiting to see what he would say

"I do…"

--

_**The Selifreick infirmary:**_

--

Sirius's hand slipped from Harry's cheek unnoticed by the medi-wizards as his breath slowed then stilled.

"Beep…beep…beep….beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep" the sound rang out, announcing his departure.


	11. Chapter 11

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Title: Phases of the Moon (1/11)

Chapter 11

A/N: Last chapter everyone! Thank you all for reviewing and I appreciate all your comments I had a great time writing this story! –Jaino

--

The Great Hall:

--

Remus whispered softly "Finite Incantatem…"

"I do…I do-don't…" James stopped suddenly; he looked around confused, and then turned to look at Lily.

The whole hall gasped as they heard James answer, everyone started murmuring to themselves. Still keeping their eyes locked on the couple, they watched riveted to see what would happen next.

"Wha-what?" Lily looked outraged "What do you mean you don't?" her fist clenched, in surprised anger.

"Just what I said, I don't want to marry you… I-I don't even know how we even got this far…" James trailed off confused.

Lily turned towards Remus "It's all your fault you-you… ruined everything!" Lily spat the words out at Remus.

"Urgh!" she cried out in frustration, her hand with the red gem ring shot out to grab James's arm. But Remus saw the movement before she could do anymore damage, he gripped her by the wrist and twisted her arm back. Remus slammed his hand at the back of Lily's head, knocking her out.

The people watching were shocked to see mild Remus act so roughly with anyone. Remus saw Peter edging away from the platform, "James stop Peter!" Remus yelled.

Not understanding why, James still caught Peter with a quick "Petrificus Totalus" froze in the "running man" pose, falling over he landed on the ground.

"Enough!" Dumbledore spoke up at last from his position behind the minister. "Everyone you're dismissed, leave immediately." His voice prevented any arguments. He had a small sense of familiarity with this situation…

--

A few days later:

After Dumbledore had called a Ministry of Magic Official, Remus explained to them what he thought really happened. Lily and Peter were soon given 'Vertitaserum'.

Remus was right; Lily and Peter had teamed up together to break Sirius and James apart. Lily had used a potion to taint the food and drinks she gave James at their "tutoring sessions" to slowly manipulate James.

But the ruby like ring was the tiebreaker, it had a spell casted on it, to entrance the person the wearer desires, into manipulating the victim however the wearer wanted.

Peter used a potion Lily brewed to spike Sirius pumpkin juice that morning of the Whomping willow accident. It enabled Sirius to lose any consequence thought of what was right and wrong, increasing distrust and heightened protectiveness in the drinker.

They were quickly sentence to await trail for Azkaban. Remus shook his head sadly, all the pain Sirius went through…. The betrayal and guilt he and James were now facing… all because two people jealously wanted what they could never have… what a waste.

--

James sat in the abandon classroom, knees pulled up to his chest. He remembered all the good times that happened in this room and the one worst moment of his life happened here also.

James vaguely heard the door click open then close. "You know Moony, Sirius told me he was pregnant the last time I was in this room…" head resting on his knees, eyes closed. "He-he said that he still loved me and I was a father"

He felt Remus put an arm around his shoulder, shrugging it off James jumped up and walked away from Remus "Don't… just don't comfort me, not after everything I've done-said…. I don't deserve it…" his voice thick with emotion.

"Prongs, it's alright, its okay you were under a spell you didn't know-" Remus went to James trying to comfort one of his best friends.

"No! yo-you don't understand!" James cried out "I-I told him that, he was a whore, and-and it wasn't my baby. If there was one at all, I said-I said" James couldn't say any more tears were running down his cheeks, as wails were pulled from his throat.

Remus didn't say anything just took James in his arms and did what he did before, hold on and give the only thing he could comfort.

"I need to see Si-Sirius, Moony I-I have to apologize an-and explain…." James voice strutted, trying to talk around his tears

"I love hi-him Moony an-and I can't live with out him… Bu-but I don't know where h-he is…" he muttered heartbrokenly.

As cries trailed off to sniffles, Remus swiped James face and pulled him up. Dragging James behind him they walked out of the classroom.

"Stop…" James stumbled; his foot hit a slightly raised cobblestone, trying to keep up with the fast pace. "Remus where are we going?"

Remus didn't stop or slowed down, he was on a mission "To see Dumbledore, I think he knows where Sirius might be…"

--

Walking down the Halls of Selifreick, James nervously picked at the hem of his robes, fidgeting with his shoulder bag. As soon as Dumbledore told him where Sirius was, he quickly set out for Selifreick.

Since he'd never been there, he had to take a few trains to reach Montrose, and then another day to enter the school. But anything was worth getting to see Sirius again.

Professor Dumbledore had let the Headmaster know that he was coming to see Sirius; though it was still the summer holiday, Sirius stayed in the school, having nowhere else to go. James saddened by the news, resolved to bring Sirius back with him no matter what.

James came to a stop at the schools infirmary. He was told that the Headmaster was there attending to some business.

"Hello?" James stepped through the open door, seeing no one he began to wander around "umm is anyone in here? I'm sorry to bother you but I'm looking for the Headmaster… hello?"

'Thump… scuffle….thump… swish' James could hear noises coming from the back

Walking to the back of the empty infirmary, James took in the room; it looked just like the one in Hogwarts…. Strange… there at the right corner was a door that was opened halfway, where the noises where coming from.

Approaching the opened door James softly said "Hel-lo…" James stared in shock at the sight in front of him; startled he dropped his bag with a 'thump'

--

Harry shifted on Sirius's chest, pitch-black hair fluffed out, and deep green eyes blinked as the baby quietly cuddled against his mother.

Sirius smiled softly, patting Harry's bottom. 'Sirius was very happy, he had died after giving birth to Harry, but the medi-wizards had casted a few powerful spells to joint him back to life.

Kissing the top of the baby's downy hair. It took days to get some of his strength back, but in a few months Sirius would be back to his original self. But it was worth it, he wouldn't trade anything in the world for Harry'

Hugging Harry to him Sirius started to hum a little lullaby to the tiny baby. 'He wondered what James was up to…. If he and Lily were still….'

Shaking his head to get rid of those thoughts. 'No he had Harry now, he wouldn't think about James anymore. James who didn't want him or Harry…"

"Hel-lo…" Sirius thoughts were interrupted 'Thump' looking towards the door Sirius froze in shock.

James stood in the doorway, a bag at his feet. They both stared at one another, not moving, only breathing.

James was the first one to glance away; he looked at the dozing baby in Sirius's arms and back again. He slowly picked up his fallen bag, moving cautiously towards Sirius and the baby.

Sirius watched warily as James approached them, all kinds of thoughts were running through his head. When, how, and most importantly why James was here in the first place.

James stood next to the bed, looking at Sirius… beautiful Sirius with longer hair, deep blue eyes; his heart ached at the sight of the same blue eyes but with more then a touch of sadness to them. James wanted to scoop Sirius up and never let go, drop to his knees and beg forgiveness, he didn't even deserve but wanted…needed so badly.

A whimpering noise brought James attention to the tiny baby in Sirius arms, James eyes moistened at the sight of his baby boy. He knew instantly that the baby was his, with his moppy hair and miniature features; there was no mistaking the resemblance. Watching as Sirius patted the baby back to sleep, James felt longing for them.

Fumbling for his bag James reached in and pulled something out "He-here… it's umm it's for the baby…" James held the stuff Puffskein out.

Sirius had tensed when James reached in his bag, but now started in wonder at the stuff toy.

"Umm I didn't know if it, I mean the baby was a boy or girl… so I thought that every kid loves Puffskeins… so umm…" James stuttered with nervousness, he placed the toy down beside the baby.

"What is this really about James?" Sirius was tired, and he didn't, _**couldn't**_ deal with this right now.

"I-I well Sirius…." James took a deep breath and decided to just take the plunge "I-I love you…" he held his breath waiting for Sirius to say something, anything.

"You- you love me?" James nodded "I thought… you and Lily…" Sirius closed his eyes

Tears pricked his eyes. "Get out James… get out and don't come back, I never want to see you again…"

James's face drained of all its color "No, you don't mean that Sirius"

"Yes I do James, you can't- you just can't come back into my, our lives whenever you want James!" Sirius was anger now, trying not to disturb Harry, Sirius tried to keep his voice down. "After what you said the way you treated me, you think you can just pop in say you love me and that's the end of that? It doesn't work that way James"

Sirius saw James flinch with every word, he didn't care, he wanted to hurt James the way he was hurt. "Where were you when I almost died giving birth to Harry, huh? I bet you were fucking that bitch Lily, weren't you!" yelled the last part, Harry began to cry, startled by the loud noises going on.

Sirius stopped and tried to soothe Harry's wails, "Sirius please I didn't mean any of it, I wasn't myself, I didn't even know what I was saying those things to you" James franticly tried to explain to Sirius while he was trying to comfort the baby.

"She… they drugged me, and-and you but it's over now. Remus stopped everything. And their both in Azkaban, they can't hurt us anymore, and you got to believe me Sirius I never want you to- to" James started to cry, he just wanted Sirius to understand to forgive him.

James laughed bitterly to himself, he realized, he and Sirius had switched places. Now he was the one asking for forgiveness, but all that remains now, is if Sirius would do what James did and turn his back on him.

He wouldn't blame Sirius if that's what happened, hell James wouldn't forgive himself if he was Sirius either. He just hoped that Sirius would be kind of enough to let him see the baby now and then… maybe they could even become friends again.

Sirius sat shocked as he heard everything James had said, Harry was now asleep again. "What- what did you say? They did what? Who?…" Sirius couldn't believe what he had heard.

Tearfully James started to speak again "Lily and Peter… they planned the whole thing. To break us up so that they could each have one of us."

James wiped his eyes "Lily made potions and an enchanted ring to get me to do all those things to you, and-and Peter used a potions Lily made to drug you into doing the thing with Snape. Remus he-he figured it all out and stopped me from marrying Lily, he broke the spell an-and"

James voice almost broke "Dumbledore had a Minster of Magic official to-to put them on trail for Azkaban…" James trailed off, his face bowed as he stood over Sirius and sleeping Harry.

Sirius laid there shocked, not knowing what to say. He thought of all the harsh words James had spoken to him. He was tempted to tell James to sod off again, and never come near him and Harry again.

But one look at James hugging his arms looking so miserable and almost completely devastated Sirius hesitated.

"Sirius… I'm so, so sor-ry" James voice choked out, eyes full of tears meeting Sirius's own wet eyes.

"Your-your not lying are you…" Sirius asked still slightly unsure.

"No… it's all true ask Remus or Dumbledore… you can even look in the paper if you want… its all there…" James swallowed

Sirius was silent, just staring at James.

"I-I'm sorry you know… I never ever wanted to hurt you, I love you so… much…" James reached out to Sirius his hand trembled.

Sirius stared at the hand reached out at him… James hand trembled and slowly pulled away, eyes averted.

Suddenly he felt a hand slip into his before he could pull away completely. "I love you…" came the whispered reply.

James leaned over Sirius carefully hugging him and the sleeping baby, "Thank you…"

Though they both knew it would take a lot longer to work out all the hurt, they were both willing to try again, taking it slow for now…

Two broken hearts started to mend that day, cushion between them was a product of the love they shared… and one day when their love fully mended it would be stronger then ever. Because you can't kill true love you can only shatter the pieces, but like a jigsaw puzzle, it was only a matter of time before the pieces made a picture again.


	12. Chapter 12: Epilogue

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Title: Phases of the Moon

Epilogue: 1 year later...

--

Sirius smiled today had been perfect, James look so cute in his tuxedo. The wedding went smoothly… well almost smoothly, Harry just started walking and managed to get away from "Grandpa Dumbie" Sirius still laughs his ass off at that one. James nearly died of embarrassment when he heard that, though… Professor Dumbledore seems to enjoy it.

"Hey sweetheart" a husky voice whispered in Sirius's ear "I dropped Harry with Moony, so we have night all to ourselves…" James pressed a kiss to Sirius neck; they locked eyes in the mirror.

"Can't wait luv…" their lips met in a passionate kiss, they moved together towards the bed, slipping off clothes while they went, till they lay upon the bed completely nude.

Their bodies withered on the silk sheets, twisting in pleasure… all too soon they both reached the highest point of their pleasure, slowly drifted down from their high.

James tiredly rolled over, pulling Sirius to lie upon his chest.

Kissing hair he whispered, "I love you Mr. Sirius Potter Black"

Sirius smiled softly into James chest "I love you too Mr. James Potter Black"

With that they both started to drift, they had a beautiful, intelligent baby boy, they had good friends and family and tomorrow they would greet the world as Husbands, life didn't get any better then this.

"James…." Sirius spoke softly

"Mmmhmm…" James tiredly murmured.

"How do you feel about another baby?"

--

The End.

--

Extra! Interlude after the make up scene:

"Sirius…."

"Yes James?"

"The baby's a boy right?"

"Yes James that's why his names Harry…"

"Can-can I hold him?"

"Yes… but be careful James…"

"He's so tiny…. very soft… hello Harry I'm your daddy…"

"Sirius?"

"Yeah James?"

"Why's Harry's eyes green?"

"Oh It's from my mothers side of the family… why?"

"Nothing… just wondering…"

"…"

"…James…"

"I just thought he should have your beautiful blue eyes is all…"

"…"

"Sirius?"

"Shut up and kiss me idiot"

"Wha-? Mmmmph……Mmmmmm"

--

A/N: Hope you liked the end, I adore fluff! -Jaino


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